It ain’t uncommon for my female fans to develop little crushes on me from time to time, seeing as I am the web’s most respected smut connoisseur, and I’ve got a dick that matches my giant head. I found out in a funny way that Gracie Gates had fallen under my spell: the pink-haired cutie broke into my home and stole my lunch. I looked all over for my missing sandwich, but only found nibbled pieces here and there. The soft giggle as I searched should have clued me in, and what I ultimately found under my couch cushions made me forget all about my rumbly tummy. “Boring sandwich you got here, Porn Dude,” Gracie said. “There’s no meat in it.”
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